There are four types of people in this world who wear an all-black sneaker.
Child molesters (professional, van driving lurkers.) People without the mental capability or manual dexterity, through no fault of their own, to tie a shoe (Velcro) and for whom the potential of food splatter is a daily obstacle, which brings us to Waitresses, at Friendly's, (where ice cream makes the meal). Subcategory of this is modern waitress with permed hair and smoker's cough which is distinguished from historical waitress; 1972-1996. The fourth, very specific individual who demands, on all occasions, the functionality and versatility of such a shoe, a shoe which represents such a wide variety of lifestyles with such a monochromatic specificity? My father.
Originally published at A Thing of Today.
